DETERMINING / CHANGING STYLE OF COMMUNICATION

DETERMINING / CHANGING STYLE OF COMMUNICATION

It has,  become an issue of critical value for all budding students to identify their style of communication and take conscious steps to change it to the assertive style of communication.

It is a journey starting with change in the mindset of the individual – changing it from negative thinking to a positive one. It signifies changing from „I should‟ to „I want to‟ and finally to „I will‟. The subtle differences in these stages of transition are:

(1) „I should‟
Such statements demonstrate powerlessness that places the ability to act quite outside the control of the speaker. These are passive statements and rarely, result in getting people to act.

(2) „I want to‟
These statements include expression of the intent to a desired level in a speaker. The listener taking action, as a result, is likely.

(3) „I will‟
Such statements are assertive as they claim ownership of the idea and present the concept to the listener in the present tense of „here and now‟. The speaker takes control of the idea and listeners‟ acting on it becomes imminent.

It is said that one is as good as his thought – positive thoughts bring in positive self-recognition and self-confidence and negative thoughts result in negative self-confidence, submissive or aggressive behavior. Everyone must learn to determine his style of communication and make all out efforts to change over to assertive style of communication.

A few time-tested strategies for assertive style of communication are making first good impression, clarifying / building image of the goal, making purposive statements and using language that is straight, direct from heart to heart. Other tried strategies are speaking with empathy, paraphrasing from time to time, collecting feedback while speaking and sustaining listeners‟ interest.
Individuals with assertive style of communication have high level of listening skills, are good at making new contacts, are quick in their responses and are persistent with issues while remaining flexible all the time.