COMMUNICATION SKILLS - Listening Behaviors

COMMUNICATION SKILLS - Listening Behaviors

So what are the keys to effective listening?
Careful analysis of skills that are used by people who are
recognized as ‘good listeners’, show that they use a variety
of techniques Some active listening skills are given as follows:

• Stop talking- listen openly to the other person.
• Remove distractions.
• Be receptive to the other person. Demonstrate
that you are prepared to listen and accept what
they are saying (without automatically agreeing
with it). Non-verbal cues can be particularly
important here, e.g. maintaining an open posture,
appropriate/comfortable eye-contact, leaning
slightly forward. These are sometimes known as
attending skills.
• Delay evaluation of what you have heard until you
fully understand it.
• Try not to be defensive. Try to relax as any tension
or impatience is likely to transmit via non-verbal
leakage.
• Maintain attention. Respond through your own
facial expressions or body gestures such as a nod
or a smile without interrupting the other person’s
flow. This indicates that you are listening,
interested and seeking to understand what they
are saying and feeling (again, using attending
skills). Be patient.
• Ask the other person for as much detail as he/she
can provide; reflect back or paraphrase what the
other is saying to make sure you understand it
and check for understanding. Paraphrase by
asking short non-interrogative questions, using
some of what the speaker has said to check your
understanding;
In summary, listen for message content, but also listen for
feelings. The latter tends to be communicated via nonverbal
cues such as tone of voice, facial expression etc.
Feelings can be reflected (e.g. ‘you seem really worried
about this?’ or ‘you seem to be feeling frustrated or
annoyed. Is that the case?’). Offering this feedback enables
any corrections of misinterpretations to be made.
• Ask appropriate questions e.g. ask the other for
their views or suggestions to broaden your
understanding of their position.
• If possible and appropriate, particularly in
meetings, take notes; decide on a specific follow-up
action and date.

The Communication Process-Active Listening Skills

The Communication Process-Active Listening Skills

Effective communication is heavily dependent on effective
listening, something many of us may not be fully proficient
at. An additional purpose of effective listening is to convey
interest and respect for the other person. 

This is crucial if we are to have any ability to help solve problems and satisfy the other person's needs and goals as well as our own. Giving constructive feedback, explored in greater detail in Section 4, depends on a wide range of skills including listening skills and feedback skills.

Why is the process of effective listening so elusive? Think of a time when you have pretended to listen whilst continuing with what you were doing or thinking. Think also of a situation where you sought to half listen to another with the intention of tuning in when something of particular
importance was said. These are very common occurrences and it is unlikely that you have not experienced them. In fact, most conversations do not take place with the full
attention of those taking part. However, our ability to selectively listen in this way is not very good and as a result, valuable information can be unheard and lost.

Studies have shown that listening is the most frequent aspect of workplace communication  Other studies have identified that managers spend 65-90% of their working day listening to someone, with the percentage of time increasing with level of managerial responsibility

However, research suggests that misunderstandings are the rule rather than the exception, and that people generally achieve no more than 25-50% accuracy in interpreting the meaning of each other’s remarks (Spitzberg, 1994). Becoming fully proficient at listening would therefore seem to have significant influence on workplace communication and related effectiveness.

Effective listening is a specific skill that can be consciously developed and practiced in various workplace situations, whether a meeting, supervision session, telephone conversation or chance meeting in the corridor. Listening is not simply a matter of hearing. Listening is an active psychological rather than passive process, which enables us to attach meaning to all the information we receive. It requires concentration and effort.

As we listen to others we interpret and evaluate the meaning from the verbal and non-verbal information that we receive. We also plan and rehearse our response in preparing to execute it. While the processes of evaluation, planning and rehearsal occur subconsciously, they can nevertheless interfere with effective listening. It can be important to maintain awareness of this to ensure that the
processes that mediate between listening and speaking do not actually interfere with the listening process itself.



Developing effective listening skills involves two specific
steps These are:

1. To develop the ability to recognise and deal with
barriers that prevents you listening with full
attention.
2. To develop and use behaviours which help you to
listen. Such behaviours can also serve to let the
other person know that you are giving them your full
attention

Conflict Management

Conflict Management

Conflict between and among group members at the workplace can be thus negative
or positive, depending upon a managing perceptions. Unresolved conflict produces
dysfunctional (negative) outcomes for the group. individuals require all the skills
discussed above and tact to minimize the adverse repercussions of conflicts and
transform problems into possibilities.  Each problem owes its complexity to the context it
originated from and takes the shape as it is given by its owners.

“There is an immutable conflict at work in life and in business, a constant battle between
peace and chaos. Neither can be mastered, but both can be influenced. How you go
about that is the key to success.”

Conflict Management--Trust-Building Skills

Conflict Management--Trust-Building Skills

Another skill that is critical in effective conflict management is that of trust-building.
Trust is a core psychological and interpersonal issue. Trust building activities can break
down barriers and build deep feelings of trust and reliance between individuals and
within small groups.

Trust building activities help people to develop mutual respect, openness, understanding, and empathy, as well as helping to develop communication and teamwork skills. If conflict parties do not trust each other, they tend to move away- cognitively, effectively, and physically - from each other rather than collaborate with each other in the negotiations.

Trust is often viewed as the single most important element of a good working relationship.
Trust-building is both a mindset and a communication skill. Especially in conflict
situations, when people experience high anxieties with unfamiliar behavior (e.g., accent,
nonverbal gestures etc.), they may automatically withhold trust. Well-founded trust is
critical in any effective and appropriate management of conflicts.

Conflict Management--Face-Management Skills

Conflict Management--Face-Management Skills

Managing people should learn to cultivate face-management skills in dealing with interpersonal
and inter-group negotiations competently.

 Face-management skills address the fundamental issue of self-esteem. All human beings like to be respected and be approved of in their daily interactions. However, how they behaviorally show such self respect needs and concerns as well as how others accord them respect and dignity very likely differ from one context to the next.

Now ‘giving face’ means not humiliating others, especially one’s opponents, in public. Individualists may want to learn to “give face” to the collectivists in the conflict negotiation process. It also means acknowledging collectivists’ interpersonal and inter-group concerns and obligations.

 Collectivists, on the other hand, may want to reorient ‘face-work’ concerns and learn to pay more
attention to the substantive issues at stake.

Collectivists may also want to recognize that individualists often separate substantive
issues from socio-emotional issues in conflict. Conversely, individualists may want to
pay more attention to the interrelationship between substantive issues and face-work/
relational issues when negotiating disagreements with collectivists. Thus, although the
concern for face maintenance is universal, how we manage face issues is a cultural specific
phenomenon.

Conflict Management Skills - Attitude for Mediators

Conflict Management Skills - Attitude for Mediators

The following attitudes are relevant whenever you want to advise, in a conflict which
is not your own. It may be a friend telling you about a problem on the telephone. It
may be an informal chat with both conflicting people. It may be a formally organized
mediation session.

• Be objective - validate both sides, even if privately you prefer one point of
view, or even when only one party is present.

• Be supportive - use caring language. Provide a non-threatening learning
environment, where people will feel safe to open up.

• No judging - Actively discourage judgments as to who was right and who
was wrong. Don’t ask “Why did you?” Ask “What happened?” and “How did you
feel?”

• Steer process - Not content! use astute questioning. Encourage suggestions
from participants. Resist advising. If your suggestions are really needed, offer
as options not directives.

• Win/win - Work towards wins for both sides. Turn opponents into problem-solving
partners.

Conflict Management - Mediation Skills

Conflict Management - Mediation Skills

Mediation is a voluntary, guided process where an impartial mediator helps the parties
to negotiate. The process is not binding unless or until the parties reach agreement,
after which the final agreement can be enforced as a contract. While mediation cannot
guarantee specific results, there are trends that are characteristic of mediation. Below
is a list of some of the benefits of mediation, broadly considered. Mediation generally
produces or promotes:

• Economical Decisions
• Rapid Settlements
• Mutually Satisfactory Outcomes
• High Rate of Compliance
• Comprehensive and Customized Agreements
• Greater Degree of Control and Predictability of Outcome
• Preservation of an Ongoing Relationship or Termination of a Relationship in a
More Amicable Way
• Workable and Implementable Decisions