Roadblocks to Communication-Gender differences
Allan and Barbara Pease describe, in their book “Why men don’t listen and women
can’t read maps”, in a very funny way a very serious fact: the differences between men
and women in the way they communicate. They demonstrate that the differences were
forged by the functions men and women had for ages in their effort to survive: men
were hunters, focused on their task; women were raising children focused on building
and keeping relationships. As a result of these different functions their minds also
specialized along those lines and researches demonstrate:
Men’s minds have less speaking centers than women’s
Mothers, daughters and sisters will often speak on behalf of the men from their family:
Try to ask a small five year old boy “How are you” and his mother or sister will immediately
answer on his behalf “Very well, thank you!”
A man speaks an average of 2000 to 4000 words/day, a third of the quantity spoken
by a woman. This difference becomes visible at the end of the day, when man and
woman eat together at home. He finished his words reserve; she still has a lot more.
Listen to them, does it sound familiar?
Men interrupt each other when speaking only as a sign of rivalry or
aggressiveness. “Do not interrupt me” shout men to women, all over the world in all
the languages.
Men’s statements always include solutions to the problems they are speaking about
so they feel they have to speak without being interrupted. For a woman this is strange,
because her main intention when speaking is to build relationships and less to solve
problems.
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